Comedy / 2026-02-12
Thing
A consumer object becomes a companion, then a reminder that possessions promise permanence they cannot deliver.

Recording
Thing
Smartass Amoeba
Lyrics
Thing
By Smartass Amoeba
There was a Thing
I wanted to own
I squirreled and saved
And took out a loan
Then came the day
It arrived at my home
It was a triumph
And the endorphins flowed
Thing makes me happy
Thing is my friend
Gorgeous and snappy
Together until the end
Now it is with me
All of the time
I worry if it's happy
Or the victim of crime
Me and the Thing
We were fire and might
It was part of my days
And all of my nights
Thing makes me happy
Thing is my friend
Gorgeous and snappy
Together until the end
Shallow and hollow
Yes that was my style
Material possessions
And smiling all the while
Golden arrow of consumption
Have the rules been obeyed?
The years went by quickly
Thing was old way too fast
Like life itself
Thing never meant to last
Then came the day
Thing was dumped in a bin
We had drifted apart
Demise of Thing was the sin
Thing made me happy
Thing was my friend
Worn out and withered
The inevitable end