Two Amoebas Walk Into A Bar

Two amoebas walk into a bar
Takin a break from their petri jar
Grab a stool, grab some peanuts
They dont need ID because theyre genus

One scotch neat, make it a double
Split the check, if its no trouble
Heres to me! they both toast
Dont watch whats next if you easily grossed

Four amoebas out to get pissed
You never seen mitosis like this
Dont judge us because we look like flab
Damn you sir just grow our tab

We ride single file to hide our numbers
Misunderestimate us would be a blunder
You start counting, we object
Thats not math, thats disrespect

This room was smaller when we walked in
Now we eight are drinking gin
It is so much fun
Sex only takes one
After the lovin we can only grin

Sixteen amoebas out to get pissed
You never seen mitosis like this
Dont judge us because we look like flab
Damn you sir just grow our tab

A tiny mob stumbles out the door
Thirty-two checks settle the score
Dont ask us why or what it means
Amoebas always just split the scene